"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
