just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
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