Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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