Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize