Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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