I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
