Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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