I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
