I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
