At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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