Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Sext me about skeletons
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
