Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
