i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
