i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
