Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
