and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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