just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
