Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize