i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
