playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
