so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
