I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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