it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
