I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
