One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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