I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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