This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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