you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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