batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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