Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
