Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
