We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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