Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Randomize
