I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
