Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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