So drunk its hurt
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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