I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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