this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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