i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
