I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
