I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
