Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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