I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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