Umm I'm too high to move.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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