If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
