If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
