Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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