I hate your face
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
