is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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