how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
false alarm. still invincible.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
